Fair Play

June 7, 2019

By Reverend Paul N. Papas II

June 1, 2019

 

 

Fair play seems to be a complex concept that comprises and embodies a number of fundamental values that are not only integral to sports but are relevant in everyday life.

Fair competition, respect, friendship, team spirit, honesty, integrity, care, excellence and joy are part of fair play that can be learned, experienced and exhibited.

Fair play is really conformity to Godly rules. Cheating is obtaining advantage by unfair or fraudulent means; dishonest behavior; deception; trickery.

If you have to win by cheating you have not won.

If you alter official documents to win; you have in reality proved you are on the loosing side of the issue.

If you have hidden certain relevant information to win; you have in reality proved you are on the loosing side of the issue.

Altering official documents and hiding certain relevant information could find you in need of a good criminal attorney.

The Boy Who Always Won

There was once a boy who liked nothing more in the world than to win. He loved winning at whatever it may be: football, cards, video games… everything. And because he couldn’t stand losing, he had become an expert in all kinds of tricks and cheating. He could play tricks in practically every situation, without being noticed; even in video games or playing alone. He could win without ever being caught.

He won so many times that everyone saw him as the champion. It meant that almost no one wanted to play with him; he was just too far ahead of everyone. One person who did play with him was a poor boy, who was a bit younger. The champion really enjoyed himself at the poor boy’s expense, always making the boy look ridiculous.

But the champion ended up getting bored with all this. He needed something more, so he decided to apply for the national video games championship, where he would find some competitors worthy of himself.

At the championship he was keen to show his skills but, when he tried using all those tricks and cheats he knew from a thousand different games, well… none of them worked. The competition judges had prevented any of the tricks from working.

He felt terribly embarrassed: he was a good player, but without his cheats, he couldn’t beat a single competitor. He was soon eliminated, and sat there, sad and pensive. Finally, they announced the name of the tournament champion. It was the poor boy from home. The one he had always beaten!

Our boy realized that the poor boy had been much cleverer than him. It hadn’t mattered to the poor boy if he lost and got a good beating, because what he was really doing was learning from each of his defeats. And from so much learning he had been transformed into a real master.

From then on, the boy who had loved winning gave up wanting to win all the time. He was quite happy to lose sometimes, because that was when he would learn how to win on the really important occasions. (1)

Today’s news shows a few boys and girls who believed they were entitled to always win. They were used to cheating and covering for each other. They believed they were going to get away with their hoax that almost destroyed our Constitutional Republic. I don’t see evidence they have given up wanting to will all the time.

These few boys and girls caused a lot of good people to become anxious and fearful. These few boys and girls who ruined lives and reputations in their quest to always win continue their spiral into marginality. These few boys and girls simply can not accept the will of the people and the fact they lost. Perhaps a closer look at these few boys and girls will find they exhibit antisocial personality disorders.

Sooner or later, cheating is always uncovered. I believe these few boys and girls are headed for a great uncovering.

If you find you always have a need to win at all costs it is time to reevaluate yourself before you run into a rude awakening.

 

Reverend Paul N. Papas II is a Pastoral Counselor with Narrow Path Ministries (MA and AZ) and Founder of the Family Renewal Center (AZ) www.narrowpathministries.org and www.familyrenewalcenteraz.org

 


(1) https://freestoriesforkids.com/children/stories-and-tales/boy-who-always-won


Problem Bigger Than The Answer?

March 1, 2019

 

By Rev Paul N. Papas II

February 26, 2019

 

 

Temporary solutions to permanent problems are never temporary or a solution.

If you always do what you always did you will always get what you always got.  Just because you do not know the answer right now, it does not mean there isn’t one.

Ever had a time when mountain dropped right down right in front of you while the walls around you closed in? Did you immediately have a panic attack or work your way out?

Are you dealing with a broken marriage? Is your spouse filing for divorce? Do you want to save your marriage but right now feel helpless? I know the answer to your problem.

Have you been dealing with significant health problems? Have your problems negatively impacted your career, marriage, parenting, finances, and your desire to be active at church? I know the answer to your problem.

Have a child who is going astray?

Just lost your job?

Got cancer?

Struggling with depression?

Not sure what to do with your life?

Now what?

Will you curl up in a corner, snivel, and cower in fear?

How do you deal with STRESS?

There is no such thing as a stress-free job in  the  world.  Everyone in his/her work is  exposed  to  tension, frustration and anxiety as he/she gets through the duties assigned to him/her. In order to make our work experience and environment as pleasant as possible, it is better that we learn the technique of moderating  and  modulating  our  personal  stress  levels

Your reaction depends upon your view.

Are you like the ten spies who came back scared and afraid of the giants in the land or are you like Joshua and Caleb?

Remember what happened when the Israelites reached the Promised Land?

They had just been rescued out of 400 years of slavery. They had walked through the Red Sea and had watched the Egyptian army drown. They had been miraculously guided through the wilderness, and been promised a land flowing milk and honey.

Eleven days after God gave them His Law and His promises, the children of Israel arrived at the border of the Promised Land. Moses chose 12 men – the top leaders out of hundreds of thousands – to explore the land and see if God was telling the truth.

After 40 days they returned with evidence: “We went into the land to which you sent us, and it does flow with milk and honey! Here is its fruit” (Numbers 13:27).

Is there evidence in your life of God’s promises fulfilled? A job, education, home,  relationship, circle of friends? Maybe you should be divorced – and God healed your marriage. Maybe you should be in jail – and your case was thrown out. Maybe you should be dead – and you were healed.

Or on the other hand, maybe your life is proof that NOT believing God’s promises is fruitless. Maybe you’re still addicted, or angry, or sad and hopeless. Maybe you’ve forgotten God’s character and God’s promises and have accepted second best – which is just what the evil one wants us to do.

Joshua and Caleb saw the same scary things as the other ten spies. Joshua and Caleb trusted God, encouraged the Israelites to believe God’s promises: “Let us go up at once and take possession, for we are well able to overcome” (v. 30).

The other 10 spies got scared by the scary things and doubted God (v. 31-33): “We are not able to go up against the people, for they are stronger than we.” They said they saw giants “and we were like grasshoppers in our own sight …”

That lack of faith spread like an infection through the entire congregation of Israelites, who promptly forgot all the miracles they had seen and doubted the nature of God – plus had the nerve to try to stone Joshua and Caleb!

Throughout human history, God has communicated His promises to us over and over, but still we demand “proof.” It’s our fallen nature to doubt, to hold off from trusting until we see everything in place in a way that makes us feel comfortable. Of course, that’s not trusting. That’s saying, God, You aren’t who You say You are.

Today, if you’re more like the 10 spies than like Joshua and Caleb, you may feel like a “grasshopper” facing a giant. All you need to do is trust. It’s as simple as that.

Enter your promised land – your daily walk with God and wherever He takes you – and watch God bless you! Now you know the answer also.

 

Reverend Paul N. Papas II is a Pastoral Counselor with Narrow Path Ministries (MA and AZ) and Founder of the Family Renewal Center (AZ) www.narrowpathministries.org and www.familyrenewalcenteraz.org



Do You Really Want Justice?

October 5, 2018

By Rev Paul N. Papas II

October 1, 2018

 

Would you agree that if the accuser brings a false report of wrongdoing that the one bringing the false report should receive the punishment he wanted imposed upon the falsely accused?

After a wrongful incarceration: “The innocent person released after years of wrongful incarceration … they’re on the courthouse steps with their lawyers looking very triumphant. That person gets nothing from the state, no transportation home, no home, no apology, nothing.” (1)

After spending the majority of his life behind prison walls, the job search was understandably difficult “Filling out job applications meant accounting for the 38-year gap in his employment history. And while Clay’s conviction was overturned by a judge, an employer checking for a criminal background would still see his arrest for murder.” (1)

Using the opening question should the one who wrongfully spent 38 years in prison be replaced by the one who falsely accused him?

It might happen at least in one case where a grand jury indicted a former Louisville detective who worked on the cases of at least three innocent men who were wrongly convicted. (2)

Where does a falsely accused person go to get his good name back?

In cases where people are convicted in the court of public opinion without due process, where do they get their good name back?  Where do they work unmolested to support their family?

The ideas of justice and righteousness are deeply connected in the Bible. Both are richly applied to many things, from fair weights and measures, to just legal proceedings, to good personal conduct, to honesty and truthfulness, to an individual’s right or just claim, to employers’ economically just behaviors, to judges’ fair decisions, to the governmental responsibilities of kings and rulers.

The clear meaning of “justice” is “what is right”, the way things are supposed to be. The fairness of laws coupled with fair and equal treatment under the law is common biblical concerns. Justice can also mean “deliverance,” “victory,” “vindication,” or “prosperity” — but for all, not just a few. Justice is part of God’s purpose in redemption.

Unfortunately many today have taken up violence as their first response where civil public discourse used to be common place.

Those causing the violence are intent on instilling fear, just like any bully. Unfortunately this violence could cause serious injuries both physically and to ones mental health.

There is certainly nothing wrong with expressing your disagreement, it is the manner and form of your expression which may become disagreeable.

In times in the not too distant passed it was common to sit around a table to share and discuss differing views and resolving problems. We could get there again, starting today one person at a time.

If we could get back to have to having civil public discourse we would have a lot less people being falsely accused, a lot less fear and anxiety as well .

Ready to begin?

 

 

Reverend Paul N. Papas II is a Pastoral Counselor with Narrow Path Ministries (MA and AZ) and Founder of the Family Renewal Center (AZ) www.narrowpathministries.org and www.familyrenewalcenteraz.org 

 

Deuteronomy 19:1-21 (NKJV)

16  If a false witness rises against any man to testify against him of wrongdoing,
17  then both men in the controversy shall stand before the LORD, before the priests and the judges who serve in those days.
18  And the judges shall make careful inquiry, and indeed, if the witness is a false witness, who has testified falsely against his brother,
19  then you shall do to him as he thought to have done to his brother; so you shall put away the evil from among you.
20  And those who remain shall hear and fear, and hereafter they shall not again commit such evil among you.

 

(1) https://www.innocenceproject.org/frederick-clays-life-post-exoneration/

 

(2) https://www.innocenceproject.org/former-louisville-detective-charged-with-misconduct/



Related

https://pjmedia.com/trending/students-demand-professor-fired-after-he-champions-due-process-says-accusers-sometimes-lie/

https://www.sarahpalin.com/2018/10/03/trump-scary-time-young-men-america/

https://www.thenewamerican.com/usnews/politics/item/30238-fbi-report-sinks-kavanaugh-accusers-mcconnell-schedules-cloture-vote

https://www.thenewamerican.com/usnews/crime/item/30257-always-believe-women-boy-s-life-destroyed-by-girls-false-allegations

http://conservativefighters.com/news/moms-for-kavanaugh-come-forward-with-powerful-video-to-show-support/

https://slate.com/news-and-politics/2018/09/christine-blasey-ford-lawyer-michael-bromwich.html

https://www.americanthinker.com/blog/2018/10/if_fords_lawyer_needs_a_lawyer_the_fat_ladys_singing.html

https://barbwire.com/i-was-sexually-assaulted-and-i-doubt-fords-testimony/


PTSD, Home and Away

September 7, 2018

By Rev Paul N. Papas II

September 4, 2018

 

The hidden scars from the trauma suffered at the hands a spouse, an acquaintance, a terrible accident or witnessing a trauma. PTSD has been more associated to soldiers coming back from war, however first responders and victims of domestic violence in significant numbers are also sufferers.

Something terrifying happens to you. Your heart races. Your palms sweat. You can’t sleep. You don’t want to eat. You can’t get the events of that day out of your mind. Any and all of these are completely normal responses to trauma and would be expected of any one of us. We all experience traumatic life events at some point – so we are all familiar with these physical responses. However, for many of us, particularly our service men and women, the physical responses don’t go away with time. In many cases, they become worse.

For those of us living with PTSD – Post Traumatic Stress Disorder – the world is an unsafe and scary place. Danger lurks in every corner and we are often unable to trust and unwilling to explore. Many of us find ourselves giving up activities that we once enjoyed because the anxiety and fear keep us trapped in a dark and scary place.

PTSD is a reaction that stems from a trauma. The most common image that many of us call to mind is that of a combat soldier. Our soldier has been overseas, faced combat and is now facing a series of adjustment issues as he or she acclimates to life at home. One of the more common stereotypes that come to mind is a combat veteran having a reaction to fireworks. While yes, the noise of the seasonal display can absolutely trigger memories of traumatic events faced overseas, many veterans face far more commonplace challenges. (1)

 

Fifteen months of carnage in Iraq had left the 29-year-old debilitated by post-traumatic stress disorder. But despite his doctor’s urgent recommendation, the Army failed to send him to a Warrior Transition Unit for help. The best the Department of Veterans Affairs could offer was 10-minute therapy sessions — via videoconference. (2). The results of the failure to provide treatment led to a time in jail for this veteran.

The week before the 4th of July and the week after is a tense time for military veterans with post-traumatic stress disorder, some of whom might be startled by the celebratory fireworks.

“Some of the veterans I treat say it’s ironic that we have a holiday celebrating the freedoms they helped fight for, but parts of it can be terrifying for them,” Catherine Coppolillo said. (3)

Despite efforts to reduce the stigma and other barriers faced by veterans seeking psychological counseling, encouraging new work is being done to change this. Since 2011, some of that work was conducted in classrooms at William James College, a small school located west of Boston. William James College claims it is the only U.S. psychology graduate school focused on training veterans as counselors.

“If you talk to most vets, they want to talk to people who have had the same sets of experiences,” Robert Dingman, the director of military and veterans psychology at the school, recently explained to Reuters. “We don’t believe by any means that only vets can help vets, but we think it’s a good career pathway.” (4)

People often find help by helping others with their issues.

Everyone is dealing with something. Some scars are visible some are not. There are many who have found a way to overcome what many would call a disability. Just know you are not alone, there is a way back. Look for that outstretched helping hand waiting for you.

 

Reverend Paul N. Papas II is a Pastoral Counselor with Narrow Path Ministries (MA and AZ) and Founder of the Family Renewal Center (AZ) www.narrowpathministries.org and www.familyrenewalcenteraz.org 

 

 

 

New PTSD Treatment for Soldiers and Families download

http://www.patriotoutreach.org/docs/military_prasies.pdf

 

(1)  http://www.militaryconnection.com/blog/11562/knowing-understanding-ptsd/

 

(2) https://www.stripes.com/army-vet-with-ptsd-sought-the-treatment-he-needed-by-taking-hostages-but-got-jail-instead-1.152525

 

(3) https://journaltimes.com/news/local/fireworks-triggering-combat-ptsd-for-area-veterans/article_22de84c4-117a-5da7-8ca8-de37cd8b89fd.html

 

(4) https://www.wnd.com/2017/06/chuck-norris-sees-a-new-way-to-look-at-pstd/

 

Also see

http://www.militaryconnection.com/blog/11591/ptsd-treatment-art/

 

https://www.wnd.com/2017/09/chuck-norris-powers-up-new-ptsd-help/

 

https://www.military.com/benefits/veterans-health-care/ptsd-frequently-asked-questions.html

 


 

 

 


Fear of Success

June 1, 2018

 

By Rev. Paul N. Papas II

May 28, 2018

 

 

You will be successful if you decide you’re going to be. Get out of your own way and quit with the excuses.

Success is never an accident. It’s a choice.

Are the decisions you are making today changing your life for the better or worse?

Identifying feelings is important as the excitement of success can feel like anxiety for some. For some it is that anxiety which relates to a trauma they experienced somewhere in life.  No one gets out of life unscathed.

Our pasts have a way of throwing up roadblocks; it could be words someone said or event. You decide where you are going to live in the past OR the present heading to the future.  Time to go over, under, around, or through the obstacles holding you back: leave them on the side of the road as you travel on the road to success.

Get up out of that chair, go to the door, turn the handle, open the door, walk over the threshold to the future, and now close the door to the past behind you.

An overnight success is never overnight.

People who do not succeed often practice self-sabotage.

What is Self-Sabotage?

Self-sabotaging can range from not returning an important phone call, turning in work assignments late, or continuing to become romantically involved with those who are emotionally unavailable. At its essence, it is engaging in behaviors that are against one’s self-interest, while at the same time not being able to practice self-care and promote one’s well being. What is so troublesome about most self-defeating behavior is that it primarily operates on an unconscious level, making it often very difficult to address.

So often we feel it is an outside force that prevents us from realizing our dreams when in fact it is our own fears that ward off opportunity. Too often I’ve heard someone say that God must not want me to have this, when in fact the person has a deep seated fear of moving beyond their comfort zone to accept the greater responsibilities that growth and success offer.

One thing I have noticed increasingly is that many people who regularly consume self-help and spiritual healing products remain stuck in unhappiness.  Chasing after the next new book, course, seminar, healing modality has become an addiction in our quest to liberate ourselves from continued suffering.  Yet, as the high of the promise and hope of the product leaves you, you find yourself back to where you’d started.

Are you satisfied with making dozens of calls for the satisfaction of making that many calls or are you satisfied with making a few good calls that led to changing your future for the better.

Our pasts have a way of creeping in and being a part of our future. They can be heavy objects to move out of the way. What do you need to let go of? What words have others said that still fill your mind?

If you always do the unsuccessful things of the past, you’ll always get what you always got….and it is not success.

Success is never an accident. It’s a choice.

You will be successful if you decide you’re going to be. Get out of your own way and quit with the excuses.

See you on the road to success.

 

Reverend Paul N. Papas II is a Pastoral Counselor with Narrow Path Ministries (MA and AZ) and Founder of the Family Renewal Center (AZ) www.narrowpathministries.org and www.familyrenewalcenteraz.org 

 

 


Head For A Soft Landing

May 4, 2018

By Rev Paul N. Papas II

May 1, 2018

 

 

After a long hard day some people head for a soft landing into their favorite chair to unwind, relieve stress and relax. Some exercise to relieve stress, some soak in a warm tub.

Stress is any change in the environment that requires your body to react and adjust in response. The body reacts to these changes with physical, mental, and emotional responses.

Stress is a normal part of life.

Not all stress is bad.

Stress can motivate people to prepare or perform, like when they need to take a test or interview for a new job. Stress can even be life-saving in some situations. In response to danger, your body prepares to face a threat or flee to safety. In these situations, your pulse quickens, you breathe faster, your muscles tense, your brain uses more oxygen and increases activity, all functions aimed at survival.

Harmful stress needs to be dealt with and relieved to escape what could turn out to be long term life changing events such as stroke or heart attacks.

Soaking in warm water has a soothing effect on both the body as well as the mind. Its relaxation and therapeutic benefits are based on the stimulation of blood circulation and release of muscle tension. Hot baths initially rise heart rate and temperature, and to dispel the heat, the body perspires which gets rid of toxins. Then the blood vessels dilate and improve circulation, thus removing lactic acid from muscles, lowering blood pressure and easing pain.

Many who suffer from anxiety or depression have found a good soak in a warm tub to be a natural and helpful relief. A good soak in tub has proved to be helpful for many other reasons as well.

You may also try a very natural stress reducer in getting a good night’s sleep. It is well known that insufficient sleep leaves people irritable, cranky and on edge, whereas too much sleep will have the effect of making them sluggish and depressed.

Soft landings are preferred by birds, planes, and economists. Not many people I know would prefer the sudden stop of a crash, whether it be in a plane, car or health issues. Crashes cause damage to people, property, and the economy.

There are certain foods and activities which add to stress then again there are certain foods and activities which reduce stress. Generally processed food can help produce stress as your body in not adequately fed with required nutrients. Long stays in front of a TV or computer can cause or add to stress.

Soft landings can be found in spending quality time with your family or pets. Horses, dogs, and cats crave personal attention and help you to a soft landing.

Eight Ways Your Pet Can Help You with  Relieve Your Stress and A Soft Landing: 1. Just being around an animal decreases your blood pressure; 2. Our pets decrease our reactions to stressful situations; 3. Pet owners on average get more exercise; 4. People with pets are less likely to say they feel loneliness; 5. Pets help you be in the moment; 6. Pets lower stress by fulfilling our need for touch; 7. Pets seem to help support feelings that make you more resilient at dealing with stress; 8. Finally, they make us laugh(1)

 

Reverend Paul N. Papas II is a Pastoral Counselor with Narrow Path Ministries (MA and AZ) and Founder of the Family Renewal Center (AZ) www.narrowpathministries.org and www.familyrenewalcenteraz.org  

 

 

References

(1) http://www.vetstreet.com/our-pet-experts/8-ways-your-pet-can-help-relieve-your-stress

 

https://www.webmd.com/depression/features/pets-depression#1

 


When All Seems Lost

February 2, 2018

By Rev Paul N. Papas II

January 28, 2018

 

Not many people have been spared the feeling at one time in their life that all is lost. That situation is an invitation to find a way to go over, under, around or through the predicament. The other choice is devolve into such a depression and allow fear and anxiety to overtake you, it is a choice.

Alcoholics and Drug addicts have to come to the bottom of their bottoms to get to the point when all seems lost. Businesses facing bankruptcy come to the point when all seems lost. A relationship breakup can bring one to a point where all seems lost. The 1929 cash brought many to the point when all seems lost, some completed suicide over it.

Some brave men and women who lost parts of their bodies as a result of injuries received in combat protecting our Freedoms probably had a few moments when all seemed lost. Many of these brave veterans overcame many obstacles to go on and lead productive lives.

Over the past several years leading up to the 2016 elections some thought the country was getting to the point when all seems lost. For many, hope has been restored as the economy is improving.

With a lot of hard work, after the 1929 cash people and businesses reinvented themselves and went on to rebuild the economy to once again become prosperous.

You can also rebuild and become prosperous.

Abraham Lincoln had many losses before he was elected President

 

YEAR FAILURES or SETBACKS SUCCESSES
1832 Lost job
Defeated for state legislature
Elected company captain of Illinois militia in Black Hawk War
1833 Failed in business Appointed postmaster of New Salem, Illinois
Appointed deputy surveyor of Sangamon County
1834 Elected to Illinois state legislature
1835 Sweetheart died
1836 Had nervous breakdown Re-elected to Illinois state legislature (running first in his district)
Received license to practice law in Illinois state courts
1837 Led Whig delegation in moving Illinois state capital from Vandalia to Springfield
Became law partner of John T. Stuart
1838 Defeated for Speaker Nominated for Illinois House Speaker by Whig caucus
Re-elected to Illinois House (running first in his district)
Served as Whig floor leader
1839 Chosen presidential elector by first Whig convention
Admitted to practice law in U.S. Circuit Court
1840 Argues first case before Illinois Supreme Court
Re-elected to Illinois state legislature
1841 Established new law practice with Stephen T. Logan
1842 Admitted to practice law in U.S. District Court
1843 Defeated for nomination for Congress
1844 Established own law practice with William H. Herndon as junior partner
1846 Elected to Congress
1848 Lost renomination (Chose not to run for Congress, abiding by rule of rotation among Whigs.)
1849 Rejected for land officer Admitted to practice law in U.S. Supreme Court
Declined appointment as secretary and then as governor of Oregon Territory
1854 Defeated for U.S. Senate Elected to Illinois state legislature (but declined seat to run for U.S. Senate)
1856 Defeated for nomination for Vice President
1858 Again defeated for U.S. Senate
1860 Elected President

 

http://www.abrahamlincolnonline.org/lincoln/education/failures.htm

 

Most people reading this won’t become President, but the point is you loose when you stop trying. Just because a door closes it does not mean there are no doors open for you…you just need to find the right one.

Are you where you want to be?

Have your goals been reached?

What can you do today to accomplish your goals?

If you have not found that open door, keeping seeking it, it is there.

Be encouraged by those who have overcome. They did not do it alone, but they purposed to overcome and you can too.

Today is a new day, a blank page in history. We may not be able to control the events today; however we can chose our reaction.  All may not be lost, just headed in a different direction.

Reverend Paul N. Papas II is a Pastoral Counselor with Narrow Path Ministries (MA and AZ) and Founder of the Family Renewal Center (AZ)   www.narrowpathministries.org  and www.familyrenewalcenteraz.org

 

 


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