Can We Come Together?

October 6, 2017

By Rev Paul N. Papas II

October 3, 2017

 

 

If you have a problem with someone don’t take it out on everybody else.  How do problems get solved, by an open an honest debate. Unfortunately it appears many have lost the art of debating.

Debating is an age-old way of discovering facts and persuading others, it is an argument with rules. Debating provides practice in developing sound and logical arguments.

It is said that the pen is mightier than the sword; for the most part this is true when we look at some of history’s greatest speakers and writers using their powers of language to persuade. Words change opinions, words shape the course of history and when the swords have been put down, it is words that form countries from the ashes of the bloodshed of the old.

The man who arguably began the concept of the debate, Plato was a fine writer and philosopher and makes up a trio with Aristotle and Socrates. Many of his ‘dialogues’ are in written form and address specific issues brought up with other Greek thinkers. He is most famous for the Gorgias Dialogue in which he seeks the true definition of rhetoric one of the key principles in the debating process. He also critiques Athenian oratory in the text. (1)

You probably have heard of the Lincoln – Douglas Debates which many say Lincoln won. Lincoln did not win that election however he was later considered for the Republican nomination for president where he was elected twice because of the debates.

Modern debates have made and broken candidates. It has been said that Nixon lost the election in 1960 because Kennedy was better in the debates.

Politics was not as contentious then as it is today. Some people today have their minds made up and they don’t want to be confused with the facts.  It used to be considered an honor and a pleasure to serve in public office. Many today believe they have a right to be in a certain office and throw tantrums when their coronation is canceled by the employer, We The People.

Here is an example of a lighter moment that helped win the debate and the office:

“I will not make age an issue of this campaign. I am not going to exploit, for political purposes, my opponent’s youth and inexperience,” Ronald Reagan quipped during the 1984 presidential debates when asked if, at 73, he is too old to be President. The line — a classic example of Reagan’s sense of humor — even solicited a laugh from Democratic opponent Walter Mondale. (The Republican actor-turned-statesman ended up winning by a landslide).

Once upon a time high schools and college debate teams were very popular. For awhile debate teams were cut from official activities. Recently debate teams have been returning. The lack of debating skills learned and honed on debate teams or otherwise has manifested itself in many of today’s contentious business, public, and political meetings. Yelling, violent protests, and demeaning statements have become common ways today to ‘persuade’ others. These people have not learned that you catch more flies with honey than you do with vinegar.

The yelling, violent protests and demeaning statement can cause or exacerbate fear, anxiety, PTSD, physical injury, and do suppress free speech. That is not the USA I grew up in and should not be accepted as a new normal.

Everyone has an opinion even if it does not agree with yours. Can you see theirs? In a debate you just might find some common thread which could begin the process of coming together on some issue or issues.

The USA I grew up in the teacher read the 100 Psalm in the classroom everyday in the beginning of each school day.

“ Make a joyful noise unto the Lord, all ye lands.

2 Serve the Lord with gladness: come before his presence with singing.

3 Know ye that the Lord he is God: it is he that hath made us, and not we ourselves; we are his people, and the sheep of his pasture.

4 Enter into his gates with thanksgiving, and into his courts with praise: be thankful unto him, and bless his name.

5 For the Lord is good; his mercy is everlasting; and his truth endureth to all generations.”

 

Can we come together?

 

Yes, if more people learn and practice the art of debating we can. Will you do your part?

 

Come Together – John Lennon/The Beatles (Live In New York City)

 

 

 

Reverend Paul N. Papas II is a Pastoral Counselor with Narrow Path Ministries (MA and AZ) and Founder of the Family Renewal Center (AZ)

www.narrowpathministries.org and www.familyrenewalcenteraz.org

 

—-

References

 

(1) http://infomory.com/famous/famous-debaters-in-history/

 

 

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Doing Some House Cleaning…

September 1, 2017

By Rev Paul N. Papas II

August 29, 2017

 

Every so often there comes a time when a reevaluation is needed. Whether you are in charge of a household, a multinational corporation or public official results matter.

It is true that you catch more flies with honey than with vinegar. It is also true that a few motivated people working together can accomplish more than a large group working as individuals. I may not be the best speller, but I am certain there is no ‘I’ in team.

In a household someone has to make sure the chores are done, the food is prepared, the laundry is done, and the yard is clean, just to name a few things that help a household member function.

Multinational corporations have many layers of management that have to be informed of and carryout the approved plan of action. Management is judged on their performance as well as how much they brought in or saved the corporation. Corporations exist to make money, if they consistently loose money or take a huge financial loss they could go bankrupt. Some corporations go bankrupt and reopen the next day in a new name with a clean slate. Employees of multinational corporations typically don’t have contracts binding them to their jobs making their tenure subject to the approval of management.

Multinational corporations have to answer to their shareholders, especially those holding large numbers of shares. Large shareholders often have influence over the direction of corporations.

Elected officials have to answer to the voters. Unfortunately those who seek public office often do not have sufficient funds to pay for the campaign process to get elected.  In reality those who seek public office either borrow money or seek donations to pay for the campaign process. There are many lobbyist who are eager to arrange for donations for the candidate with the idea that candidate, once in office, will vote the way the lobbyist wants. The candidate gets donations to pay for the campaign process and the lobbyist buys a vote for his client. The purchased votes can cause the public official to vote against those to whom he or she is supposed to be beholden…the voters.

The purchased votes often make it appear that there is only one party in Congress, some call it a UniParty, and some call it the Establishment.

The good news not all elected officials are bought and paid for. Not all elected officials are infected with the group think disease.

Some could think the elected officials infected with the group think disease have more than one personality (one for the voters and one for their donors) or they could appear to have Borderline Personality Disorder.

See if these symptoms match any current public officials or groups in the news:

“Everyone has problems with emotions or behaviors sometimes. But if you have borderline personality disorder, the problems are severe, repeat over a long time, and disrupt your life. The most common symptoms include:

  • Intense emotions and mood swings.
  • Harmful, impulsive behaviors. These may include things like substance abusebinge eating, out-of-control spending, risky sexual behavior, and reckless driving.
  • Relationship problems. You may see others as either “good” or “bad” and may shift from one view to the other suddenly, for minor reasons. This can make relationships very difficult.
  • Low self-worth.
  • A frantic fear of being left alone (abandoned). This fear may lead to frantic attempts to hold on to those around you. Or it may cause you to reject others before they can reject you.
  • Aggressive behavior.

Other symptoms may include:

  • Feeling empty inside.
  • Problems with anger, such as violent temper tantrums.
  • Hurting yourself, such as cutting or burning yourself.
  • Suicide attempts and suicidal thoughts.
  • Times when you feel paranoid or lose a sense of reality (psychosis).

It’s easy to confuse this disorder with other mental illnesses. And they may overlap. So if you think that you or someone you know may have borderline personality disorder, see a doctor. Don’t try to diagnose yourself.” (1)

Some groups or elected officials infected with the group think disease have become violent and threatening of late when someone disagrees with them making them a danger to themselves or to those around them. Behavior which makes them a danger to themselves or to those around them could be a reason to have them properly evaluated.

One of the foundations of the USA is the First Amendment which guarantees USA Citizens the Right to Disagree. Being assaulted for disagreeing with the speaker is not protected by the First Amendment.

There are elected officials who have shown very good leadership ability in bringing people together to accomplish the missions. Then there are others who feel if they harass and harangue they can bully people into carrying out their agenda. Perhaps they have not learned that you catch more flies with honey than with vinegar.

Disasters can bring a good insight into an elected official’s leadership ability. In May of 2013 Oklahoma Governor Mary Fallin showed her leadership ability when she brought many people together to recover after some pretty devastating tornados within her state. Churches provided much needed places in the communities for communication,  rest, shelter and supplies.  No one was waiting for or looking for Air Force One  (2)

Today we learned at a major briefing that the Texas Governor Greg Abbott has been working and coordinating with the President and his cabinet for more than a week to assist victims of Harvey. The President brought three cabinet members and their chief assistants to Texas with him. (3)  Recovery should begin faster than with Hurricanes Katrina or Sandy as Oklahoma and Texas Governors and the President show a leadership style that is more conducive to accomplishing the mission and putting the people first. Again, churches are providing much needed places in the communities for communication, rest, shelter and supplies.

There was a TV crew shooting live when it came across a two men who needed a rescue. The National Guard helicopter had issues because of the power lines. The second man who lost everything because of Harvey and did not know the first man got in trouble in the fast moving water when he tried to rescue the first man. The TV crew asked the viewers if anyone nearby had a boat to rescue the two men. Within minutes several people with boats showed up and the two men were rescued. (3)

The spirit of Harvey’s victims reminded me of the Katrina victims in the way they look out for and help neighbors and strangers. The aerial view of Harvey’s damage looked very much like the aerial view of Katrina’s damage as I flew in as a volunteer. (4)

In times of need, such as after natural disasters be it hurricanes, tornadoes, or massive snow blizzards I have witnessed neighbors and strangers pull together and help each other out. Yes, there are those who will be antisocial and take advantage of those in need and they can be dealt with.

Groups or elected officials infected with the group think disease whether or not they have become violent and threatening or condone those who have become violent or threatening need to be dealt with. Elected officials can be removed, arrested, or voted out depending on their level of involvement.

If more people thought and acted like the Good Samaritan and not like those who passed the injured man the road we’d live in a much nicer world. Yes, one person can make a difference. What difference will you make today?

Reverend Paul N. Papas II is Pastoral Counselor with Narrow Path Ministries (MA and AZ) and Founder of the Family Renewal Center (AZ) www.narrowpathministries.org and www.familyrenewalcenteraz.org

 

(1) http://www.webmd.com/mental-health/tc/borderline-personality-disorder-topic-overview#1

(2) https://reclaimourrepublic.wordpress.com/2013/05/22/video-tornadoes-help-available-prayers-answered-womans-dog-emerges-from-rubble-during-tv-interview/

(3) https://reclaimourrepublic.wordpress.com/2017/08/30/video-ready-for-onslaught-45-churches-come-together-dallas-opens-6-shelters-convention-center-for-evacuees

(4) https://preacher01704.wordpress.com/2015/10/02/where-is-your-house-built/


 


 

Military vets bring specialized skillset to Harvey response


Texas father describes mandatory evacuation with five kids


 

 


Abuse, Home, Work, Church, a Boiled Frog

May 5, 2017

By Rev Paul N. Papas II

May 2, 2017

 

 

Sometimes you can’t see the forest through the trees. Sometimes you feel like you are knee deep in alligators.

Have you become a boiled frog?

I’m referring, to the proverbial frog that, placed in a pot of cold water that is gradually heated, never realizes the danger it’s in and is boiled alive. The hypothetical boiled frog is a useful metaphor for a very real problem: the difficulty of responding to abusive situations that creep up on you a bit at a time.

Most of us become so comfortable or used to our current situation that we don’t really know how to escape from it? (the heat) Don’t put up with rising temperatures!

Let’s not be a boiled frog!

Are you in a job which doesn’t suit you, your skills, your values, your personality or in abusive situation? Have you become so comfortable or used to your current situation or in a situation in which you don’t know how to escape?

 

According to the Dictionary Abuse is defined as wrongly or improperly using one’s authority. This could mean between a husband and wife, siblings, co-workers, people in your church, boss and employees. There are different types of abuse with a common thread; an abuser’s control over another person, imposing their will upon someone else, to force them to do something against their will or prevent them from activities.

Signs that you’re in an abusive relationship

There are many signs of an abusive relationship. The most telling sign is fear of your partner. If you feel like you have to walk on eggshells around your partner—constantly watching what you say and do in order to avoid a blow-up—chances are your relationship is unhealthy and abusive. Other signs that you may be in an abusive relationship include a partner who belittles you or tries to control you, and imparts on you feelings of self-loathing, helplessness, and desperation.

To determine whether your relationship is abusive, answer the questions at the link below. The more “yes” answers, the more likely it is that you’re in an abusive relationship.

https://helpguide.org/articles/abuse/domestic-violence-and-abuse.htm

There are different types of abuse with a common thread; an abuser’s control over another person, imposing their will upon someone else, to force them to do something against their will or prevent them from activities.

Domestic violence and abuse can happen to anyone, yet the problem is often overlooked, excused, or denied. This is especially true when the abuse is psychological, rather than physical. Noticing and acknowledging the signs of an abusive relationship is the first step to ending it. No one should live in fear of the person they love. If you recognize yourself or someone you know in the following warning signs and descriptions of abuse, reach out. There is help available.

Sexual Assault is one type of abuse. An article I would recommend to keep handy is 10 Things Sexual Assault Victims Want You to Know http://www.christianitytoday.com/women/2017/april/ten-things-sexual-assault-victims-want-you-to-know.html

Unfortunately people have misused words in the Bible to impose their will upon someone else. It is not news, God Hates Abuse. One example is often repeated phrase that God Hates Divorce.

 “God hates divorce!” (Read the rest of the verse…)

Christian wives frequently hear this first part of Malachi 2:16 as though the institution of marriage trumps the lives wrapped up in it. Rarely quoted is the second part of the verse which says:

“along with the one who conceals his violence by outward appearances.”

Christian wives often think they have only two options: endure abuse or face condemnation by God for not obeying the Bible. As a result, guilt, despair, internal conflict and heartache cloak every moment as they cling to survival, trying to please both God and their husband.

The future looks hopeless, and their identity and value obscured. Children grow up as secondary victims of domestic abuse, desensitized to God’s ways and primed to continue the cycle of abuse as adults. Read more at https://godhatesabuse.com/god-hates-abuse I highly recommend reading and keeping the book handy titled God Hates Abuse.

Victims of abuse often experience and exhibit various degrees of PTSD, the same PTSD suffered by combat veterans, police officers, fire fighters, and other first responders. They also experience and exhibit anxiety, stress and distrust issues. Help is available. Just like any a clock which is too tightly wound, the unwinding must be carefully done.

Abusers oftentimes have self-worth issues and feel empowered and mighty when they abuse someone.

Here are some real examples from one family of controlling abuse:

Father beats a third grader because the third grader had a friend come over to the house…the father did not want anyone to know what was said or done in the house. This is a real example of controlling abusive behavior.

A son was called to come to the house to pick up a script for the Mom who was sick and could not get off the couch. The father, her husband, told the Mom to get up and get it yourself. They later divorced. This is a real example of controlling abusive behavior with an escape.

Years later, another son from the same family as above learns he can control the family by withholding medical updates of a hospitalized loved one.

An unrelated example is a woman Mary, not her real name, was looking for bruises on another woman, Jane, not her real name, who had her boyfriend present. Mary asked Jane if that man was her boyfriend, Jane said yes. Mary said she was looking for bruises because in her mind that is how men showed their ‘love’ for women by beating them.

No one deserves to be abused. Help is available for the Abuser, the Abused, and those affected by the abuse, just not all in the same setting.

Do your part to stop abuse today.  Learn what you can do to recognize and prevent abuse.

Abuse in Relationships: Can You See It?

 

 

Reverend Paul N. Papas II is a Pastoral Counselor with Narrow Path Ministries (MA and AZ) and Founder of the Family Renewal Center (AZ)  www.narrowpathministries.org and www.familyrenewalcetneraz.org


 

Related articles and resources

http://www.loveisrespect.org/is-this-abuse/types-of-abuse/

https://stopandpraytv.wordpress.com/2017/05/01/video-the-touch-2005/

https://reclaimourrepublic.wordpress.com/2017/01/10/video-no-weapon-shall-prosper-domestic-abuse-why-they-dont-leave/

https://reclaimourrepublic.wordpress.com/2017/04/27/video-human-trafficker-confesses-to-murdering-400-500-little-girls-banker-told-to-sacrifice-children-104-men-arrested/

https://preacher01704.wordpress.com/video-for-gods-sake-domestic-violence-and-religion/

 

 


America’s Choosing and PTSD

November 4, 2016

ptsd-one-piece

By Rev Paul N. Papas II
November 1, 2016

Certainly we all make choices every day, some have more consequences than others. In a few days America will make a choice that will affect which direction the country will take, whether or not it will remain a Republic, and whether it will recover from PTSD.

Having experienced a wide variety of campaigns and presidents beginning with Dwight David Eisenhower (Ike) this current presidential election seems to have created the most interest by voters. This one has also created the most PTSD.

Looking back two previous presidential campaigns come to mind as we head to the polls: 1964 Goldwater v Johnson (LBJ) and 1980 Reagan v Carter. In 1964 before instant news or communications Johnson told the most fanciful lies about Goldwater, painting Goldwater as fruitcake. Goldwater had written a book about what his presidency would look like. Johnson kept saying Goldwater was crazy. Johnson had the advantage of being the sitting president and the press at his beckon call. Goldwater often warned us about the Globalist. An actor, named Ronald Reagan, came to Goldwater’s defense and presented what was then a rare Coast to Coast Broadcast, in a Time of Choosing.

“A Time for Choosing” by Ronald Reagan

After LBJ was reelected he did much of what Goldwater had outlined in his book and had ridiculed Goldwater for.

Goldwater and Reagan were not the only voices of warning, as you can watch below both Eisenhower and Kennedy also warned us.

Eisenhower warns us of the military industrial complex.

JFK Secret Societies Speech

The 1980 presidential campaign had many twists and turns, perhaps not as many the current 2016 presidential campaign. A large group of professional politicians strongly opposed Ronald Reagan. They said of Reagan he is too…old, etc. Reagan appeared to be behind in the polls then won in a landslide.

I see the 1964 and 1980 presidential campaigns of LBJ and Jimmy Carter as the basis of the professional politician running for president.

In contrast I see a bit of Ike, JFK, and Reagan in the businessman running for president.

JFK in his Secret Societies speech could have been talking to us today. JFK was actually talking about current events of the cold war and how nontraditional enemies were gaining information on how the US was battling the Cold War. In this speech JFK points out “the need for far greater “official” secrecy”…as well as “the need for a far greater public information”.

JFK admits “I have no easy answer to the dilemma that I have posed,” but also states, “and would not seek to impose it if I had one.” This a major difference from where most of today’s professional politicians stand.

There has been so much information, which is mostly propaganda, provided in this presidential election that many may feel they have been traumatized by professional politicians who feel entitled to be elected. The overload of propaganda has traumatized many in this nation, giving them PTSD. This PTSD can cause problems with trust, closeness, communication, and problem solving. These problems may affect the way the survivor acts with others. In turn, the way a loved one responds to him or her affects the trauma survivor. A circular pattern can develop that may sometimes harm relationships.

What It Feels Like To Have PTSD

I think is it time for America to choose to end the professional politicians’ dependence on our wallets and have them go to work for a living. Let the nation recover from the PTSD caused by the professional politicians.

Reverend Paul N. Papas II is a Pastoral Counselor with Narrow Path Ministries (MA and AZ) and Founder of the Family Renewal Center (AZ) http://www.narrowpathministries.org and http://www.famlyrenewalcenteraz.org

ptsd-notallwounds
ptsd-soldier-consoles-peer


What Happened To Servant Leaders?

June 3, 2016

Talents gifts serve
By Rev Paul N. Papas II

May 30, 2016

 

There is a common phrase that says,’ the more things change, the more they remain the same’. Frankly, it is not always true.

Growing up I would see a full flag holder attached to each parking meter in the downtown area for Veterans Day, Memorial Day, Flag Day, and July 4th. We had a parade on Memorial Day and July 3rd that ended up at the park where the Fireworks display usually ended too soon in a big flourish.  People from all over the town came together over these very patriotic events. No matter their backgrounds or political beliefs, we were all Americans first.

This patriotic environment instilled a pride in being American. Something inside is stirred me upon seeing rows of American Flags line the streets.

At that time people who served in elective or appointed offices generally had the idea that it was a duty and honor to serve in a position for a period of time then return to private life, following the example of George Washington in declining to seek a third term as President.

In his Farwell address Washington sought to convince the American people that his service was no longer necessary by, once again, as he had in his first inaugural address, telling them that he truly believed he was never qualified to be president and, if he accomplished anything during his presidency, it was as a result of their support and efforts to help the country survive and prosper. Despite his confidence that the country would survive without his leadership, Washington used the majority of the letter to offer advice as a “parting friend” on what he believed were the greatest threats to the destruction of the nation.

While I served in different positions the patriotic lessons and the examples of many who served before me who never thought holding a political office was a career path.

Republicans and Democrats had differences of course however we did not have emails, faxes, text messages, and few had caller ID on their phones. We actually talked, either in person or on the phone, and found a path to resolve issues.

If there was a message that needed to be disturbed around town it went by way of telephone or printed flyer that was delivered to every home in town. We had a typewriter and a print shop on standby. Phones were dumb, you either dialed on a Rotary Dial or had a Touch Tone Phone, no apps. George Washington had much less than that during his twenty years of service.

Those years saw many improvements especially in the areas of helping those less fortunate and those suffering from a mental illness.  As with any request or requests for improvements we asked the questions: ’What if it were me or a family member of mine?’ and is this something that a church or private business should be handling? In a way, we were libertarian in not wanting government involved in every aspect of life.

We had a limited amount of revenue and the budget had to be balanced with respect to Police, Fire, Schools, various other services budgets while maintaining roads and town property.

You can liken the attitude of a public servant leader to that of a member of the military, he or she serves for a set numbers of years then goes back into private life. The difference between the two is; members of the military are well aware that they may be coming home in a casket. Either way the servant leader or a member of the military zeal to serve was no less diminished.

One area of improvement recognizing and treating what at one time was known as shell shock. Today PTSD is recognized as one the treatable issues first responders, victims or witnesses of abuse or tragedy can suffer in the same manner as a combat veteran can experience. Today self education and education of loved ones can greatly enhance the PTSD suffers recovery.

Yes, I miss having servant leaders in office who offer a portion of their lives to help make this a better place to live, instead of career politicians. Yes, hope springs eternal that we have not seen the last of the two thousand year old concept of servant leaders. May we look closely and choose wisely as the sanity we may save may be our own.

Reverend Paul N. Papas II is a Pastoral Counselor with Narrow Path Ministries (MA and AZ) and Founder of the Family Renewal Center (AZ) www.narrowpathministries.org and www.familyrenewalcenteraz.org 

 

WASHINGTON’S FAREWELL ADDRESS

https://www.gpo.gov/fdsys/pkg/GPO-CDOC-106sdoc21/pdf/GPO-CDOC-106sdoc21.pdf

 

Just A Common Soldier

Memorial Day: Why We Remember

Star Spangled Banner As You’ve Never Heard It

strong people help others

image from Sacredtouches.com


Have We All Gone Mad About Restrooms?

May 6, 2016

restroom-pervert
By Rev Paul N. Papas II
May 2, 2016

Yes, the economy is in the toilet and people who mean us harm are at the door. Noisy groups want to blockade whole states, and tape mouths shut over who gets into a restroom.

Let’s be clear. This is not a new offense just dreamt up by someone. This is the latest salvo in a forty year plan to destroy the family (1). To be more precise its roots are found in Genesis 3:15.

To be clear, I stand with the Sheriff in the video who said that if a guy follows my wife or daughter into the restroom, we’re going to make the news.

Men are designed and called to protect women and children (2)

Psalm 82:3 Defend the weak and the fatherless; uphold the cause of the poor and the oppressed.

James 1:27 Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.

The amount of documented cases of assaults and sexual assaults upon women and children is sobering (3). It is troubling that we are opening wide the restroom doors to any pervert who would be able to do their damage while barricading those who would protect them.

Let’s say Jane, who appears to be a full grown adult yet, has the mind of an 8 year old and is suffering with anxiety, depression, and PTSD is in a ladies room stall. In comes Jack with a beard in a dress and for the moment claims to be a women. Jack did not arrive in the ladies room to relieve himself and leave. Jack is looking for easy prey and his next victim. Jack is larger than Jane who innocently suspects nothing of danger while in the stall. Jack opens Jane’s stall door and brutalizes Jane leaving her in a heap curled up on the floor, never to be the same again.

Jack who claims to be a girl says he has a perfect right to be in the Ladies Room because he indentifies as a women. The sex thing…., it is okay… it is just part of his culture and she was there.

The same group claiming that Jack has a RIGHT to be in the Ladies Room also pushed for The Violence Against Women Act (VAWA).

The Violence Against Women Act (VAWA) was the first major law to help government agencies and victim advocates work together to fight domestic violence, sexual assault, and other types of violence against women. It created new punishments for certain crimes and started programs to prevent violence and help victims. Over the years, the law has been expanded to provide more programs and services. (4) also see the factsheet (5).

Is Jack prosecuted pursuant to The Violence Against Women Act? Considering the current climate, it would allow the pervert to walk because he was wearing a dress and his culture permits brutal rape.

Jane on the other hand is revictimized every time she tells of her nightmare in the Ladies Room stall to a Police Officer, Judicial Officer or medical person and probably every time she closes her eyes.

Defend the weak and the fatherless; uphold the cause of the poor and the oppressed have men go into the Men’s Room (it has three letters) and Women go into the Ladies’ Room (it has more than three letters.)

Reverend Paul N. Papas II is a Pastoral Counselor with Narrow Path Ministries (MA and AZ) and Founder of the Family Renewal Center (AZ) http://www.narrowpathministries.org and http://www.familyrenewalcenteraz.org

(1) https://reclaimourrepublic.wordpress.com/2016/05/01/leading-us-down-the-aisle-dems-4-point-plan-to-destroy-the-family/ and https://reclaimourrepublic.wordpress.com/2016/04/24/video-the-homosexual-manifesto-is-just-satire-silly-americans/ and
https://reclaimourrepublic.wordpress.com/2015/08/03/video-homosexuals-aiming-for-your-kids/ and https://reclaimourrepublic.wordpress.com/2016/04/26/video-5-times-transgender-men-abused-women-and-children-in-bathrooms-personal-experiences/

(2) http://parentleadership.com/protect.html

(3) https://reclaimourrepublic.wordpress.com/2016/05/02/sex-crimes-at-target-stores/

(4) https://www.justice.gov/ovw and http://womenshealth.gov/violence-against-women/laws-on-violence-against-women/ https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Violence_Against_Women_Act

(5) https://www.whitehouse.gov/sites/default/files/docs/vawa_factsheet.pdf

trans-restroom


Making The Right Choice Is Not Always Easy

March 4, 2016

boss v leader
By Rev Paul N. Papas II
March 1, 2016

Not making a decision is a decision. There hundreds if not thousands of decisions to be made everyday, starting with should I ignore the alarm clock?

Good decision-making is a skill that comes easily to some people, not so easily to others. Choices can be confusing. Choices can make you anxious. They can cost you peace of mind, even after you’ve made the decision. Have you ever spent hours in your head trying to “undo” the choice you made?

The skill of good decision-making has become increasingly important in this day and age. So much information is decimated at a rapid rate today by way of the internet and social media that it can add to the confusion.  Good decision making is needed to determine the validity of what is being thrown at us also.  Because we have an abundance of choices, both with the simple things in life and the serious things in life make a choice with a clear mind is difficult enough. Add low blood sugar, illness, or medication to the mix and the decision making process slows or stops which could add frustration. Frustration can bring us into a downward spiral of confusion which can make the decision making process come to a halt.

For those who are considered to be Bipolar, “decision making” is more difficult to say the least. Part of the struggle with making decisions is related to how far you have come with accepting your diagnosis and whether you are “stable or unstable” at the time of making a decision. Those who are not stable will generally have all sorts of struggles with things such as decision making.

When bipolar symptoms flare up you can struggle with either depression or mania and “judgment” is usually quite impaired. Thought processes are generally speeded up when mania is present and slowed down during depressive episodes. When this occurs there is an imbalance and decisions tend to be “all over the place”. Not only is poor judgment experienced but there is a struggle with focusing. Poor focus can lead to impulsive actions. As one can imagine this really impacts the ability to think clearly and make a good decision.

Moods can affect the decision making process also. Good moods can have you doing the correct steps to make good decisions. If you’re on a high or manic thoughts are so fast that in reality you’re really not thinking everything through and decisions could be impulsive.

On the contrary when you in depressive state thoughts are slowed and are generally quite negative. So again the thought process is not at a level of stability thus making poor decisions could be made as you’re not capable of thinking things through as much as you should.

There are times when good counsel of friends or professionals are needed. They can advise, but at some point decisions need to be made.

Decision making skills can be developed with practice. As decision making skills are practiced confidence will build to make more and bigger decisions.

If you are in a position to make decisions for others then you should have already developed the skill of decision making as someone’s life could depend upon it.

Effective leaders have refined their decision making skills almost to a fine art. Effective leaders know how to assemble teams of people who have also refined their decision making skills to accomplish certain goals. Effective leaders don’t assemble ‘yes men’ for an appearance of a team.

In any group there will be a leader. The best leaders will not only have refined decision making skills they will also have learned to bring people together to accomplish goals. The best leaders not only know how to lead, they also know how to follow. It is true, no man is an island.

When you have the opportunity to help select a leader look at what they have accomplished. Take a close look at who they count as their associates.  If they have adult children watch to see the values that were instilled in them. The leader you select should reflect refined decision making skills that best reflect your values.

Decide to make a decision, your life and the lives of others are affected.

Reverend Paul N. Papas II is a Pastoral Counselor with Narrow Path Ministries (MA and AZ) and the Founder of the Family Renewal Center (AZ) www.narrowpathministries.org and www.familyrenewalcenteraz.org


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