Talking Past or Real Conversation

November 30, 2018

By Rev Paul N. Papas II

November 26, 2018

 

 

If we don’t communicate we can’t get anything accomplished. At one time we all spoke the same language making easy to get our point across.  Many problems today can be traced back to our failure to communicate.

At one time we all spoke the same language, then came the idea to build a tower to reach the heavens.  The tower of Babel story is one of the saddest and most significant stories in the Bible. It is sad because it reveals the widespread rebellion in the human heart. It is significant because it reshaped the development of future cultures.

The descendants of Noah were living in the area of Mesopotami in Babylon. They settled in a land named Shinar. The population was growing and they all spoke one language. The people decided to build a tall, proud symbol of how great they had made their nation. The Babylonians wanted a tower that would “reach to the heavens” so that they could be like God and that they would not need Him. They began to construct a great ziggurat.

God did not like the pride and arrogance in the hearts of the people. God caused the people to suddenly speak different languages so they could not communicate and work together to build the tower. This caused the people to scatter across the land. The tower was named The Tower of Babel because the word Babel means confusion. This story is a powerful reminder of how important it is to obey God’s Word and to not think that we can build a successful but godless life on our own! (1)

We do like to hear ourselves talk and receive a physical boost when we do. Rejection could send us into a fight or flight mode. It was found that executives used “telling statements” 85% of the time, leaving a mire 15% for questions. On top of that, almost all the questions they asked were actually statements in disguise. For the most part no one was being convinced except the speaker.

To add to the failure to communicate our brain disconnects about every 12-18 seconds to evaluate and process, which means we’re often paying as much attention to our own thoughts as we are to other people’s words.

After acknowledging the problem individually the simple fix is to remember we have two ears and one mouth. We should use our ears twice as much as we speak.

There are people who have learned to communicate effectively despite their inability to speak.

Some get frustrated, anxious, and depressed and spiral downward when they know they are not heard. People who get frustrated, anxious, and depressed and spiral downward could then be treated for mental health issues, all for a failure to communicate.

Some act out and become violent when they feel their point of view is not being heard or believed. This violent acting out can cause physical harm to others and damage to property.  The damage to property and physical harm by this group is because of a failure to communicate.

The simple fix to end talking past others for all who desire to effectively communicate is to use are ears twice as much as we use our mouths. The simple fix is healthier and safer for all concerned and the country as a whole. The simple fix can be put in place one person at a time, no votes or committees are needed.

Let’s implement the simple fix today and use our ears twice as much as we use our mouths.

 

Reverend Paul N. Papas II is a Pastoral Counselor with Narrow Path Ministries (MA and AZ) and Founder of the Family Renewal Center (AZ) http://www.narrowpathministries.org and http://www.familyrenewalcenteraz.org

 

 

(1) https://www.biblestudytools.com/bible-stories/the-tower-of-babel.html


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