Is It Supposed To Be Fair?

October 7, 2016

Same Yesterday he13 8-2 Kristiann1
By Rev Paul N. Papas II
October 4, 2016

I hear a lot of talk lately about how many things are not fair. Who said life was fair?

Whose standard would be used in order for something to be judged fair? The mere fact that a judgment must be made insures a standard must be used to measure against. A judgment of competing ideas or goal requires that a determination be made as to which idea or portion of an idea is better than another. When a judgment is made it also means one idea or part of an idea was discriminated against. Judgments such as this have been made by each of us for many years, such as what we wear and how we wear it. The clothes we chose not to wear could complain it is not fair that they were not chosen and that they were discriminated against.

A house must be built upon a good foundation to withstand whatever weather throws at it such as wind, rain, snow, and water run-off.

Property lines must be determined from known benchmarks in order to be accurate and fair for property owners.

Building trades use a level and plumb to insure the house is level and vertically straight.

To properly build a house certain standards must be used, for example a foot must always contain twelve inches. An eight foot wall must use lumber that has eight feet with each foot containing twelve inches. Should lumber be used with ten inches in each foot the wall would be too short jeopardizing the integrity and stability of the house.

For some reason in recent years the idea that things must always be fair has become popular. Someone makes a judgment that something is unfair and the berating begins. The berating inevitably includes charges of discrimination. The person making the charge of discrimination may not realize that in order to make that judgment that person had to discriminate against one idea to judge the other idea more worthy.

Medical Doctors have standards they use in diagnosing any illness, whether it is a skin rash, broken bones, or PTSD, discriminating against one idea to judge the other idea more worthy.

The Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines Fair as:

• agreeing with what is thought to be right or acceptable
• treating people in a way that does not favor some over others
• not too harsh or critical

As we can see the dictionary definitions support the idea that a judgment must be made and discrimination against an opposing idea is required. Simply put each time someone demands fairness they are, perhaps unknowingly, demanding a discriminatory act.

“…Fairness operates at many levels. We may try to personally conduct ourselves fairly, but we are also part of a community, a society, that delivers fairness – or unfairness – to ourselves and others. It might seem tempting to see the fairness talked about in politics as separate from our personal conduct, but philosopher AC Grayling believes the two are the same. “What holds for an individual should hold for society and vice versa. The concept of fairness is univocal – it has the same meaning wherever it is applied.”(1).

Unfairness can make us angry.

Being fair requires judgment and discrimination. In order to judge there must be a standard from which to measure the various competing ideas. If the person has fluid standards, one day the foot could be eight inches, another day ten inches, and still another day a foot could be thirteen inches. Having fluid standards can create a lot of confusion for all involved devolving into chaos.

So, next time you hear about someone wanting fairness ask what standard is being used and what is being discriminated against.

Reverend Paul N. Papas II is a Pastoral Counselor with Narrow Path Ministries (MA and AZ) and Founder of the Family Renewal Center (AZ) and


Manufactured Issues Are A Distraction

September 2, 2016

safe space
By Rev Paul N. Papas II
August 30, 2016

We have enough legitimate issues that need our attention and cry out for a resolution. A number of manufactured issues are being floated as a smoke screen to distract us from, and even hide, the real issues.

We have used plenty of smoke grenades to mask troop movements from the enemy. Smoke grenades come in handy when you want to confuse the enemy and keep your troops safe.

Unfortunately, there has been a rash of manufactured issues to obfuscate the real issues in order to prevent them from being addressed. Lawyers do it all too often to keep their clients from being held accountable for their actions and creating safe places for their clients to hide.

A number of today’s college students expect colleges to have safe places in order to protect them from hearing opposing opinions. If I made be so bold to ask, how does one learn anything without asking questions, hearing differing points of view, and debating issues? If no questions are asked and no issues are debated such lack of actions ensures that no problems will be solved.

How are those who are ‘educated’ in safe places every going to be able to make the decisions required in life, never mind in business, or government or as leaders?

It reminds me of a current running TV advertisement which has a patient in a dentist chair with a person examining the patient’s mouth. The examiner tells the patient how bad his cavity is and then starts to leave the room and get ready for lunch. The examiner was not a dentist, rather a ‘dental monitor’.

Unfortunately, we have a whole lot of people who no longer feel that they have to take personal responsibility for their actions. Rather than take personal responsibility, they monitor some other person to point out their perceived, real, or imaged flaws.

This is not a new problem. It started in the Garden of Eden when Adam blamed Eve. She in turn blamed the snake. Yes, the snake practiced deceptive practices, and still does today. Adam and Eve had the choice to act, or not to act upon what they heard from the snake.

Every person has a choice whether or not to act upon what they heard from the snake. Sometimes the snakes appear as lawyers, politicians, or lawyers who become politicians.

Can you imagine going to the emergency room with a life threatening injury only to be told, that because you are (fill in the blank), you will not be treated or told to wait, and wait. A case in point is Veterans dying, or accomplishing suicide, as a result of the unexplainable failure of the Veterans Administration to treat veterans. Veterans need action, not a monitor, or career politicians’ unfulfilled promises.

Can you imagine a person experiencing a psychotic episode who is left untreated? The person experiencing a psychotic episode may harm himself or others and end up as story on the evening news.

With all our technology today, there is no excuse for not treating our veterans, or others in need of medical care. After the failure to treat, often comes an army of lawyers to spin the story to have the victims sound and look like the perpetrators.

Then we have another manufactured issue solely designed to silence any opposing views. As a country, we experienced many growing pains from which we healed, or were healing. Unfortunately, some are using a distorted version of our history to silence people who don’t think the same way. I am talking about the claim, that certain people are racist to scare them into silence. From my view point, most of those being called racist are, in fact, not racist. In the past, a claim made that someone is racist, even by members of the same race, had those being charged looking for a safe place to hide. Fortunately, some being called racist today are standing up to the bullies making the charges of racism.

The bullies who are calling others, who don’t think like them, racist are just like snake the practicing deceptive practices. Just like Adam and Eve had the choice whether or not to act upon what they heard from the snake, we have a choice not react to those scream “racists”, at opponents.

There is one safe place in which all are equal and that is at foot of the Cross. There is no racism there, as no one is better than anyone else. Titles, worldly accomplishments, and riches, mean nothing in this safe place before God.

Let’s all challenge each other to peacefully work together to find real solutions to real problems and ignore the smoke screens.

Just say NO to the snake.

Reverend Paul N. Papas II is Pastoral Counselor with Narrow Path Ministries (MA and AZ) and Founder of the Family Renewal Center (AZ) and
try Ark Titanic

Tested By Fire

August 5, 2016

Shadrach Meshach Abednego fire
By Rev Paul N. Papas II
August 2, 2016

You’ve probably heard the phrase “If it doesn’t kill you it will make you stronger.” Some cave under pressure instead of working through it. Tough times help mold you into a stronger person, a long as you keep plugging away.

At one time young men, who could not find their way sometimes, were offered a choice, enlist in the military or go to jail. It worked for some as basic training was a rigorous physical and mental exercise in which they were pushed beyond their known limits. They learned they can actually accomplish new tasks individually and as part of the team. These accomplishments gave them courage, strengthened their character, confidence in themselves, and provided tools to rely upon throughout life.

Unless you have always lived in a bubble, you have experienced tough situations. How you dealt with the tough situations help identify who you are.

Often people recognized as heroes believe others would have done what they did under the circumstances. They revealed who they are. I don’t recall any true heroes acting because it would help them make the cover of Time Magazine.

No matter what your station in life or situation you can be a hero to someone. Sometimes it just takes a small act of kindness to make a big difference in someone’s life.

I recently read an article how a nine year old prevented his newborn brother from being abducted from the hospital. Yes, he was a hero to his family. He just knew the women who picked up his brother was not acting as other nurses did and followed her.

I have witnessed mental health patients do small acts of kindness for other patients in the same locked ward.

I have witnessed some prisoners brighten the day of other prisoners.

Sure, there are enough evil things going on in this world to depress some people. I believe that no matter how bad your circumstances are, someone is worse off than you are.

The Priest who was beheaded at the Alter in his church has been reported to have said “Go away Devil”. His actions inspire others to remain faithful and strong in the face of evil and adversity.

We have many examples of people who faced evil and adversity, some battled depression also. Abraham Lincoln had many family tragedies, battled depression, lost a few elections, and was a Founding member of the new ant-slavery party, and became the first Republican President. A study of President Lincoln’s life will show he was tested by fire many times.

I believe God raises up certain people for certain times to lead, Abraham, Moses, Noah, Gideon, David are a few who come to mind, none of them was perfect. Not everyone would is raised up becomes famous. The attributes they all have in common is they stood strong in the face of evil and adversity as they were tested by fire.

The finest gold is refined by fire and had the dross removed. The evil and adversity we face is a way of having the dross removed from us as we are refined by fire. Just as the finest gold has the dross removed is the most valuable so are people who have the dross removed as they were tested by fire.

Testing by fire is inevitable; we have a say in the final product.

Reverend Paul N. Papas II is a Pastoral Counselor with Narrow Path Ministries (MA and AZ) and Founder of the Family Renewal Center (AZ) and


Later May Be Too Late

July 1, 2016
Created by Readiris, Copyright IRIS 2009

Round To It

By Rev Paul N. Papas II
June 27, 2016

“I’ll do it later and when I get around to it”. When I hear this said, I draw a large circle on a piece of paper then write “To It” horizontally in the middle of the circle. Without saying a thing I present the ‘round to it’ to the speaker and ask “Now will you do it?

Someone told me recently that he was planning the 1972 New Years Eve Party

“We like to think that our delay tactics are no big deal. After all, we tell ourselves, no one is really getting hurt by the things we put off. Over time, however, our choices to postpone action can develop into a lifelong pattern of procrastination.

To get on track, we must change our attitude about procrastination, admitting it is a serious problem and noticing where we consistently put off action. It’s important to identify any feelings of doubt and discomfort that we may have, confess that procrastination has a hold in our life, and then decide in our heart to turn away from it.” – Charles Stanley

Some things just can’t wait.

A person who is bleeding profusely or who has stopped breathing can’t wait for you to finally take that first aid course.

A diabetic can not delay eating correctly without putting himself at risk of going into a Diabetic Coma. He knows when his blood sugar level drops too low that he needs to eat something fast and not wait until the next mealtime.

A person suffering from a severe mental illness can not go too long without getting help before becoming at risk of having a psychotic episode.

A recovering alcoholic can’t wait until later to refuse to drink alcohol.

A One Day Sale won’t wait for you until next week.

Once you arrive upon a situation, which you know your help will make a difference in improving the situation, it is time to act. If you need to get around to it, follow the instructions in the first paragraph. You just may be the right, one, person in the right place, at the right time, to help that situation improve.

If everybody waited for somebody else to act, then nobody would get it done.

You don’t have to go too far, in these times, to find someone in need. Yes, you have to take care of your family first. You’re not called to give away everything you have. Give out of your abundance. Most often, your time is more appreciated, and more fruitful, when helping others with their situation.

You are also called to protect your family, which means that you can’t let the wolves move into the sheep pen. A good Sheppard guards and protects his flock.

People in your community could use your help. Your community could use your help. By community, I don’t mean only your local village, town or city.

Don’t procrastinate. If you need to get around to it, follow the instructions in the first paragraph.

While your home is being consumed by fire, you probably would not want to call a procrastinating fire department as the whole community could have been razed by fire by the time they found the instructions in the first paragraph.

If procrastination is your modus operandi, don’t wait, throw it off today, the life you save may be your own.

Reverend Paul N. Papas II is a Pastoral Counselor with Narrow Path Ministries (MA and AZ) and Founder of the Family Renewal Center (AZ) and

What Happened To Servant Leaders?

June 3, 2016

Talents gifts serve
By Rev Paul N. Papas II

May 30, 2016


There is a common phrase that says,’ the more things change, the more they remain the same’. Frankly, it is not always true.

Growing up I would see a full flag holder attached to each parking meter in the downtown area for Veterans Day, Memorial Day, Flag Day, and July 4th. We had a parade on Memorial Day and July 3rd that ended up at the park where the Fireworks display usually ended too soon in a big flourish.  People from all over the town came together over these very patriotic events. No matter their backgrounds or political beliefs, we were all Americans first.

This patriotic environment instilled a pride in being American. Something inside is stirred me upon seeing rows of American Flags line the streets.

At that time people who served in elective or appointed offices generally had the idea that it was a duty and honor to serve in a position for a period of time then return to private life, following the example of George Washington in declining to seek a third term as President.

In his Farwell address Washington sought to convince the American people that his service was no longer necessary by, once again, as he had in his first inaugural address, telling them that he truly believed he was never qualified to be president and, if he accomplished anything during his presidency, it was as a result of their support and efforts to help the country survive and prosper. Despite his confidence that the country would survive without his leadership, Washington used the majority of the letter to offer advice as a “parting friend” on what he believed were the greatest threats to the destruction of the nation.

While I served in different positions the patriotic lessons and the examples of many who served before me who never thought holding a political office was a career path.

Republicans and Democrats had differences of course however we did not have emails, faxes, text messages, and few had caller ID on their phones. We actually talked, either in person or on the phone, and found a path to resolve issues.

If there was a message that needed to be disturbed around town it went by way of telephone or printed flyer that was delivered to every home in town. We had a typewriter and a print shop on standby. Phones were dumb, you either dialed on a Rotary Dial or had a Touch Tone Phone, no apps. George Washington had much less than that during his twenty years of service.

Those years saw many improvements especially in the areas of helping those less fortunate and those suffering from a mental illness.  As with any request or requests for improvements we asked the questions: ’What if it were me or a family member of mine?’ and is this something that a church or private business should be handling? In a way, we were libertarian in not wanting government involved in every aspect of life.

We had a limited amount of revenue and the budget had to be balanced with respect to Police, Fire, Schools, various other services budgets while maintaining roads and town property.

You can liken the attitude of a public servant leader to that of a member of the military, he or she serves for a set numbers of years then goes back into private life. The difference between the two is; members of the military are well aware that they may be coming home in a casket. Either way the servant leader or a member of the military zeal to serve was no less diminished.

One area of improvement recognizing and treating what at one time was known as shell shock. Today PTSD is recognized as one the treatable issues first responders, victims or witnesses of abuse or tragedy can suffer in the same manner as a combat veteran can experience. Today self education and education of loved ones can greatly enhance the PTSD suffers recovery.

Yes, I miss having servant leaders in office who offer a portion of their lives to help make this a better place to live, instead of career politicians. Yes, hope springs eternal that we have not seen the last of the two thousand year old concept of servant leaders. May we look closely and choose wisely as the sanity we may save may be our own.

Reverend Paul N. Papas II is a Pastoral Counselor with Narrow Path Ministries (MA and AZ) and Founder of the Family Renewal Center (AZ) and 




Just A Common Soldier

Memorial Day: Why We Remember

Star Spangled Banner As You’ve Never Heard It

strong people help others

image from

Have We All Gone Mad About Restrooms?

May 6, 2016

By Rev Paul N. Papas II
May 2, 2016

Yes, the economy is in the toilet and people who mean us harm are at the door. Noisy groups want to blockade whole states, and tape mouths shut over who gets into a restroom.

Let’s be clear. This is not a new offense just dreamt up by someone. This is the latest salvo in a forty year plan to destroy the family (1). To be more precise its roots are found in Genesis 3:15.

To be clear, I stand with the Sheriff in the video who said that if a guy follows my wife or daughter into the restroom, we’re going to make the news.

Men are designed and called to protect women and children (2)

Psalm 82:3 Defend the weak and the fatherless; uphold the cause of the poor and the oppressed.

James 1:27 Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.

The amount of documented cases of assaults and sexual assaults upon women and children is sobering (3). It is troubling that we are opening wide the restroom doors to any pervert who would be able to do their damage while barricading those who would protect them.

Let’s say Jane, who appears to be a full grown adult yet, has the mind of an 8 year old and is suffering with anxiety, depression, and PTSD is in a ladies room stall. In comes Jack with a beard in a dress and for the moment claims to be a women. Jack did not arrive in the ladies room to relieve himself and leave. Jack is looking for easy prey and his next victim. Jack is larger than Jane who innocently suspects nothing of danger while in the stall. Jack opens Jane’s stall door and brutalizes Jane leaving her in a heap curled up on the floor, never to be the same again.

Jack who claims to be a girl says he has a perfect right to be in the Ladies Room because he indentifies as a women. The sex thing…., it is okay… it is just part of his culture and she was there.

The same group claiming that Jack has a RIGHT to be in the Ladies Room also pushed for The Violence Against Women Act (VAWA).

The Violence Against Women Act (VAWA) was the first major law to help government agencies and victim advocates work together to fight domestic violence, sexual assault, and other types of violence against women. It created new punishments for certain crimes and started programs to prevent violence and help victims. Over the years, the law has been expanded to provide more programs and services. (4) also see the factsheet (5).

Is Jack prosecuted pursuant to The Violence Against Women Act? Considering the current climate, it would allow the pervert to walk because he was wearing a dress and his culture permits brutal rape.

Jane on the other hand is revictimized every time she tells of her nightmare in the Ladies Room stall to a Police Officer, Judicial Officer or medical person and probably every time she closes her eyes.

Defend the weak and the fatherless; uphold the cause of the poor and the oppressed have men go into the Men’s Room (it has three letters) and Women go into the Ladies’ Room (it has more than three letters.)

Reverend Paul N. Papas II is a Pastoral Counselor with Narrow Path Ministries (MA and AZ) and Founder of the Family Renewal Center (AZ) and

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Knowledge, Pass It On

April 1, 2016

Those who don't know history Edmund Burke
By Rev Paul N. Papas II
March 29, 2016

What good is knowledge unless we pass it on? Before we had the written word information was memorized and passed on from generation to generation. Later we had scrolls, then books to store and pass on knowledge.

You may have heard: “Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” (Proverbs 22:6). Isn’t that what parents do with their children pretty much from the beginning? We teach our children fire is hot and can be used for good and bad purposes. We teach our children right from wrong while instilling values.

Children are natural learners and between birth and five years old. From birth to three years old, children grow and learn at the fastest rate of their lifetime. It is easy to see the enormous opportunity parents, and those who care for children, have in these early years to help shape children’s learning before they start school.

I recently watched again a video of Dr Ben Carson discussing how important education is to our children, families, and country and remembered a discussion I had with my grandson who was in the seventh grade at the time.

You may be familiar with Dr Carson’s life story which I think is inspiring. Look how far he came after overcoming a long list of disadvantages. His mother knew enough to encourage him to keep going. Dr Carson knew he could go anywhere and learn anything initially through books.

He like many others learned you can always work things out if you really want to. Sometimes things look pretty hopeless. When they look the worst you have two choices: give up or keep going. Give up and you’ve lost any possibility of winning. Keep going and you could find the blessing is just ahead as you clear through the fog and hailstorm. It is a sure thing that the blessing won’t come if you give up.

Here is one example in the history of the USA which determined whether we were going to remain an independent country:

“On a rainy September 13, 1814, British warships sent a downpour of shells and rockets onto Fort McHenry in Baltimore Harbor, relentlessly pounding the American fort for 25 hours. The bombardment, known as the Battle of Baltimore, came only weeks after the British had attacked Washington, D.C., burning the Capitol, the Treasury and the President’s house. It was another chapter in the ongoing War of 1812.

A week earlier, Francis Scott Key, a 35-year-old American lawyer, had boarded the flagship of the British fleet on the Chesapeake Bay in hopes of persuading the British to release a friend who had recently been arrested. Key’s tactics were successful, but because he and his companions had gained knowledge of the impending attack on Baltimore, the British did not let them go. They allowed the Americans to return to their own vessel but continued guarding them. Under their scrutiny, Key watched on September 13 as the barrage of Fort McHenry began eight miles away.

“It seemed as though mother earth had opened and was vomiting shot and shell in a sheet of fire and brimstone,” Key wrote later. But when darkness arrived, Key saw only red erupting in the night sky. Given the scale of the attack, he was certain the British would win. The hours passed slowly, but in the clearing smoke of “the dawn’s early light” on September 14, he saw the American flag—not the British Union Jack—flying over the fort, announcing an American victory.

Key put his thoughts on paper while still on board the ship, setting his words to the tune of a popular English song. His brother-in-law, commander of a militia at Fort McHenry, read Key’s work and had it distributed under the name “Defence of Fort M’Henry.” The Baltimore Patriot newspaper soon printed it, and within weeks, Key’s poem, now called “The Star-Spangled Banner,” appeared in print across the country, immortalizing his words—and forever naming the flag it celebrated. “


Back to the conversation with my grandson, we were discussing our country’s history when I learned that he did not know key events leading up to the Second World War Being a student of history I imparted what I knew about WW II. I thoroughly enjoyed the time with my grandson. I remember thinking at the time what a sad indictment of our schools that our future leaders don’t know how we got to where we are today.

How can the children of today become tomorrow’s parents, teachers, doctors, and leaders without knowing how to gather the facts? Anyone can read from a script handed to them, which means they are just followers. However life is about new challenges everyday. Being new means the script has not yet been written. Leaders in any field may need to pave through uncharted waters, without a script. How can cures for diseases be discovered without critical thinking scientists?

Parents, grandparents, aunts, and uncles can all do our part in shaping tomorrow by instilling family values, a thirst for knowledge, and knowledge of history in our future leaders. Remember, those who don’t know history are doomed to repeat it. Edmund Burke

Are you ready to shape tomorrow?

Reverend Paul N. Papas II is a Pastoral Counselor with Narrow Path Ministries (MA and AZ) and Founder of the Family Renewal Center (AZ) and

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